Palin Quits...Again.

From nationalbroadcasters' YouTube entry:
"An angry crowd shouts at Sarah Palin...on November 19, 2009 after Palin quits and refuses to sign books for around 300 families that spent about 3+ hours getting wristband and another 3+ hours waiting in line to get the Palin book signed."

Go, Look: Cover Art Copycats

Or: 'Reusable Cover Art in Historical Novels -- A Gallery'
(Via.)

Inkwell Irregulars, Assemble!

Here's an easy post: A list of links to bookish blog posts made by our Inkwell Irregulars. Not only does it save me the time of sorting through an unwieldy assembly of AP articles featuring the words 'book,' 'publisher,' and 'bookstore,' it links you (our beloved blog reader) to them (our other beloved blog readers). Incestuous? Sort of. But this is a cult -- that sort of thing is par for the course.

This is one of those pitch-perfect posts that's just one well-connected Tweet away from becoming an internet sensation: Estoreal's Without Boulders -- Woody Allen's long-lost Flintstones script.


Daij is a poet whose blog, Soultight, either inspired the poem posted here, or visa-versa. Whichever, I know I'm going to be reciting this vitriolic verse like a mantra throughout Thanksgiving dinner.


Frank Black from The Friday Night Boys put up a nice birthday tribute to Spider-Man co-creator and Ayn Rand devotee, Steve Ditko. The bio is brief, the pictures are perfect, and now I feel like a class-A heel for having missed the maestro's birthday myself.


For those of you struggling with a NaNoWriMo novel, Rachel Stark's What Can a Job Interview Teach You About Writing? will no doubt prove useful. Hell, even if you're not writing a book and are just suffering through an extended spell of unemployment, the tips might still be worth checking out.


I'm currently making my way through all 196 issues of Chris Claremont's original run on The Uncanny X-men, but that's nothing compared to the time-consuming task that Robert has set out for himself over at The Matt Murdock Chronicles: He's reading and reviewing the entire Daredevil comic book series.


Elizabeth Avedon's photography and book design both possess the same bold and iconic visual appeal. To think that one person can achieve such similarly spectacular effects with two wholly different mediums is hella cool...and slightly nauseating. Join me in my jealousy. Click here to check out a small sampling of her work.

Well, that's it for today. If'n you'd like to join our slowly expanding band of backwoods, book-loving belligerents, click here. All we ask is your life-long devotion, adoration, and a firstborn or two.

Book News, In Brief

The Bad Sex Award shortlist pits Philip Roth's The Humbling against Nick Cave's The Death of Bunny Monroe. While Roth silently stews, Cave's publishers have put out the following press release: "Frankly we would have been offended if he wasn't shortlisted." Rad.


Q: Who doesn't like boobs & boners? A: Portland City Commissioner Randy Leonard. OregonLive.com reports, "The owners of Cindy's Bookstore, torn down in 2008 after repeated inspections, have sued City Commissioner Randy Leonard, the city, PGE and others for nearly $1 million, arguing Leonard selectively enforced ordinances against businesses he doesn't like."


Raul Vazquez, Walmart.com's chief executive officer, told Bloomsbury.com that the big W's deep discounting on new release hardcovers in no way constitutes "illegal predatory" practices. Oh, okay. If you say so, Raul. Wait -- do you pinky-swear? You do? Alrighty then. Um, while we're carrying on an imaginary conversation, do you think I can grab a job application? CUZ YR GONNA PUT MY BKSTR OUT OF BIZNIZ!!!


A fear of H1N1 (and a very good chance of getting punched in the face by some of the publishing people I've pissed off here) caused me to miss last weekend's Boston Book Fair. If any of our readers were able to attend, and they happened to snap a photo of the rare, 1853 book, Dance of Death, please post a link in the comments section. For those of you unfamiliar with this timeless children's classic, Dance of Death illustrates different ways to die, is bound in genuine human skin, and includes an inlay of a skull carved from human bone and teeth.

Scutopedia Entry #00001

The Inkwell's very own Wendell 'Scutopus' Edwards coined a new word today. I'll let him tell it:
"Those customers who come in talking about how much they love bookstores to their friends, wander about looking at everything, and then leave without buying anything are just one species of...meanderthal! One person even came in today saying they wanted to own this very store, yet left with nothing but that which they entered. Walk the walk, folks!"

No, that's kind of sad.

Catherine Hardwicke warns TIME of Twilight's long-lasting effects:

"For so many little girls, Edward will always be their first love. They are going to be 80-year-old women in the future that will remember Rob, love Edward Cullen, and remember Twilight. That's kind of awesome."
Via: Movie City News

Cool Covers from Recent Comics Releases

X-Men Origins: Iceman #1
Cover by Phil Noto
DC Holiday Special 2009
Cover by Dustin Nguyen
















Nomad: Girl Without A World #3
Cover by Rafael Albuquerque
Batgirl #4
Cover by Phil Noto
















Buffy The Vampire Slayer Season 8 #3
Cover by Adam Hughes
Looney Tunes #180
Cover by Scott Gross

Adaptation News(where 'faithful' is the only f-word you're not allowed to say)

Reverse adaptation! BBC Books has commissioned Michael Moorcock to write a Doctor Who novel. Predictably, the nerds are nervous.


Even a bitter, old a-hole like me finds a bit of holiday spirit in animatronic department store dioramas. Click here for a peek at Bergdorf's Fantastic Mr. Fox display.


Lovely Bones director Peter Jackson says that he had to shoot extra footage for the film after test audiences complained that the death scene wasn't violent enough.


McG's inevitably atrocious adaptation of 20,000 Leagues Under The Sea would've been a unending source of cynical blog posts. Alas, Disney has sunk the project.


In an obvious bid for Oscars and accolades, Dreamgirls dream-girl Jennifer Hudson has signed on to star in Winnie, a biopic based on Anne Marie du Preez Bezdrob's Winnie Mandela: A Life. Wasn't my undying lust enough for you, Jen?

Yee-Haw! It's the Negative Review Round-Up!

Not only are negative reviews easier and more fun to write than positive reviews, they're easier and more fun to read, too. So pick up your torch and join me and the mob as we heap hate upon a few recent releases in this week's installment of The Negative Review Round-Up.
(Note: As most of us are lying, whorish, booksellers ready to sell our souls to make a softcover sale, I've also included small print links to some positive reviews. Feel free to crib liberally from these when dealing with the money-wielding masses.)

Cable #20 by Duane Swierczynski
Review by Tucker Stone:
"The best part of the comic is that the story's title is Checkmate, which means that Swierczynski thinks chess analogies can be approximated by having two steroid fantasy men beat the shit out of each other with space weapons, endlessly."
To read the whole review, click here.
(Then again, Duane Swierczynski loved it!)


And Another Thing... by Eoin Colfer
Review by Paul Constant:
"Let's make one thing perfectly clear: And Another Thing..., Eoin Colfer's authorized sequel to the late Douglas Adams's Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy series, is a horrible, pointless book. The first, and perhaps most egregious, crime Colfer commits is simply not being funny. His book is unimaginative and sloppily devoted to Adams's previous work. [...] Colfer doesn't even try to mimic Adams's sublime Wodehouse-writes-Monty Python-in-space mashup style. Instead, he vomits up some halfhearted fan fiction and expects to coast on his predecessor's reputation."
To read the whole review, click here.
(Then again, Geek-speak loved it!)


What The Dog Saw and Other Adventures by Malcolm Gladwell
Review by Steven Pinker:
"An eclectic essayist is necessarily a dilettante, which is not in itself a bad thing. But Gladwell frequently holds forth about statistics and psychology, and his lack of technical grounding in these subjects can be jarring. He provides misleading definitions of 'homology,' 'sagittal plane' and 'power law' and quotes an expert speaking about an 'igon value' (that’s eigenvalue, a basic concept in linear algebra). In the spirit of Gladwell, who likes to give portentous names to his aperçus, I will call this the Igon Value Problem: when a writer’s education on a topic consists in interviewing an expert, he is apt to offer generalizations that are banal, obtuse or flat wrong."
To read the whole review, click here.
(Then again, The Telegraph UK "is entertained by" it!)

Book News, In Brief

Having grown bored with simply warping the romantic fantasy worlds of their reality-deprived readership, Harlequin has teamed up with print-on-demand publisher Author Solutions to eff with their readers' writing fantasies as well.


Britain's bestselling anonymous author/high-class whore has gained the respect of millions hundreds after revealing herself to be a -- wait for it -- neurotoxicology scientist. The lesson for sexually abused young ladies considering a career in blowjobs and blogging? Get that PhD, girl!


The residents of Poligny, France banded together to buy the lease to their local, failing, indie bookstore, all in an effort to keep it up and running. Note to our Right-wing readers still stuck in the halcyon days of domestic terrorism: 'Freedom fries' is out. We're now calling them 'F*ck yeah fries' or 'Charity chips.'


Omaha.com and The Philadelphia Enquirer held hands, closed their eyes, and took a giant leap in logic, introducing the insane hypothesis that non-fiction is "easier to read" than fiction because (1.) "memoirs are easier for book groups to discuss" and (2.) would-be writers prefer penning memoirs to novels. Using these same two groups' preferences, I've come up with a couple more crap hypothesis: (1.) The easiest foods to eat are wine and Pepperidge Farms products and (2.) in the age of print-on-demand publishing and the Espresso book machine, typing = writing.

Famous Authors' NaNoWriMo Tips(as found on twitter) Part II!

The response to our original Famous Authors' NaNoWriMo Tips over on the NaNoWriMo forum was so positive (well, except for the angry and damning responses, but who listens to those b*tches?) that we decided to put together a follow-up post. To keep things fresh, all of today's fictitious Tweets come courtesy of the NaNoWriMo forum members and the commentors on our LiveJournal page. Needless to say, all hate mail should be directed their way.

1 by Strawhenge:

@Chucky_P #NaNoWriMo tip: I am Jack's repeated sentence to convey tedium and madness.


1 by Ken Dee:

@M_ Crichton#NaNoWriMo tip: Copy entire chapters from science books as dialog. worked for all my books.


1 by Simmons:

@JaneA. #NaNoWriMo tip: It will do very well, if you please, to continually and properly refer to everyone as his or her well deserved title, always.


1 by Malfoys_Olive:

@Homer #NaNoWriMo tip: Begin in the middle of ur story, have MC recite entire story from beginning. Also refer to every1 in enumeratio (i.e. Apollo, the son of Zues)


1 by SlackJawedSmurf:

@JesusHChrist #NaNoWriMo tip: Have half ur book B backstory/prologue. Then have the main novel told from p.o.v. of several different people. Kill off a few characters, resurrect some, add an epilogue, hint at a sequel.

1 by unconventionalwriter:

@T_Pratchett #NaNoWriMoTip Put as many obscure philosophies & life lessons as U can. Also include scenes w/ Death, the representation.

2 by hasse:

@Will.i.am.Faulkner #NaNoWriMo tip: Emotions, descriptions, random outbursts of thought are all wonderful. Go for 100+ in 1 sentence!


@THE_BaRd #NaNoWriMo tip:Thou shalt not be brief. Brevity is the soul of wit, but wit shall come w/ edits. 4 now, debateth every action: 2 be, or not 2 be? Marry, decide later.

2 by a_tannenbaum:

@R_Chandler: Become an alcoholic & get fired from yr job in the midst of the Depression. If that doesn't force U 2 take up writing seriously, NOTHING will.


@HenryJames: My preferred method is a sort of thinking aloud, as it were, or more precisely, upon the page, thereby producing longish paragraphs which proceed, in a desultory way, from place to place, sometimes arriving somewhere, as if by accident and with an embarrassed air, as if not knowing how they got there; and sometimes, of course, not arriving anywhere in particular, though always ready to resume the journey, to who knows whither to find who knows what, and so, by an earnest seeking after truth, to come at last to the final shore of another completed novel, with maunderings and hesitations and vagueness enough to perplex scholars and bemuse the public.

Tuesday's Tips for Flailing NaNoWriMo Writers

This week's installment of Tuesday's Tips is dedicated to those delusional dilettantes who have taken up the National Novel Writing Month challenge: The completion of a 50,000 word novel in just 30 days. Having passed the halfway mark two days ago, I thought I'd offer these marathon imagineers the bookstore blogger's equivalent of a paper cup filled with lukewarm water -- randomly selected writing links!


You're 25,000 words in and suddenly it hits you: What if the book I'm writing isn't the "right" book? (Via.)


Or maybe you're having the opposite problem. Maybe you're 25,000 words in and already wondering, 'Hmn...What To Write Next?'


Then again, what if your problem isn't with what you are writing, but why you're not writing? Christina Baker offers a possible cure with Break the Block in Five Minutes. (Via.)


Did you know that in the time it took you to read these links, you could've already written another 200 words? S'true. Still, what's the rush? When writing anything of value, It Takes The Time It Takes.


With only 13 days and half a novel to go, editing may not be on the top of your to-do list. So why not try and kill two birds with one stone -- editing while you write. Copyblogger covers this concept in a piece titled, How To Write With A Knife.


Last but not least, Write to Done has 5 Simple First Draft Secrets. (An unsolicited 6th: Remember, first drafts are like learning to cook when you know you're the only one who's gonna eat it. Worse comes to worst, you stick your finger down your throat and vomit/place your finger firmly on the Delete key and curse the muse.)


Related:
Famous Authors' NaNoWriMo Tips (as found on twitter)
Top 10 Night Before NaNoWriMo Tweets
Tuesday's Tips for NaNoWriMo Writers 11/3/9

Lack of Funds Leaves €3m Library Full, Closed

The Independent.ie reports: It has been feted internationally and at home as an outstanding example of Irish architecture. But a state-of-the-art €3m library -- which was recently one of nine Irish nominees at prestigious international architecture awards -- is sitting idle because there is no money to hire staff to work there.
To read the rest, click here.

Call me a cynic...

...but when I read that an anonymous patron recently returned two high-school library books that were due back in 1958 (along with a $1000 money order!), my first thought was: Either this guy's trying to temporarily alleviate himself of the guilt over the dozens of dismembered bodies buried in his backyard, or having overdue library books was actually the worst thing he'd ever done in his life. Either way, I'd hate to have him as a dinner guest.

Book News, In Brief

Good news for Goodwill: Your free-standing bookstore is the only bookstore making any money. Bad news for Goodwill: Y'all are beggars, and where's the pride in that?


Bad News for Borders: The economists at The Motley Fool think you're going to go the same route as Circuit City. Good news for Borders: My brother who doesn't read thinks you're rad.


Clip and save: A wallet-sized cheat-sheet listing the many lies and mistakes found in Sarah Palin's soon-to-be bestseller, Going Rogue. Now you're really gonna be a blast to have at parties.


A nose always knows: "The complex perfume of aging books" has been broken down into its "component chemicals" by research scientists who hope this can be used to help with preservation and restoration.


I only care cuz it'll make me money: When Stephenie Meyer was on Oprah last week, a gaggle of giggling schoolgirls asked if there would be a fifth book in the Twilight series. While the answer was originally "cut for time," Meyer's response has since shown up online.

4 Fun Comics-Related Links

The Beat put up a funny post about the 'Brokeback Pose,' a.k.a. the stereotypical superheroine pose where you can see the heroine's breasts and bum at the same time.


More controversial imagery from an industry imbued with it: Every Day Is Like Wednesday highlights 8 Inappropriate Pictures from one of Marvel's "Appropriate for ages 9 and up" Comics.


I was born a few years too late to enjoy this particular cultural touchstone, but Maxim's 12 Superheroes Who Should Be On '70s Vans makes me wish I was around when the airbrush artist was king.


And if I could only pick one link for you to click? The Best Thing Ever's review of Yotsuba&! If you're not already reading this book, carrying this book, and pushing this book on every customer with good taste that walks through your bookstore's door, NOW'S THE TIME TO START.

Recommended Viewing:You Should Judge A Book By Its Cover

Pilfered with pride from We Sing Sin.

Book News, In Brief

THB and Heavy Liquid creator Paul Pope just won the 'Silver Dildo' for Sexiest Art at the first annual Fleshbot Awards. You can peep some of Pope's work here.


FOX 6 News reports: 'Man Burglarizes Christian Bookstore, Stealing $8.' Jesus, I guess Bible bookstores aren't doing much better business than us sin-filled shops.


1990s comics superstar Peter Bagge recently posted a comic strip about the extreme reactions Ayn Rand's work inspires in today's politically polarized populace. It's called 'Will Everyone Please Stop Freaking Out Over Ayn Rand?!?'


Further proof that the publishing industry isn't looking for 'The Next Big Thing,' but instead, 'The Last Big Thing,' Little Brown has inked a five book deal with Lemony Snicket author Daniel Handler...for five new Lemony Snicket books.

Go, Look: 11 Films About Writing

StumbleUponUs.com has either one-upped the typical Top 10 list, or fallen two short of the fabled baker's dozen. Whichever, the flicks picked are all great...well, except for Shakespeare In Love.
Writers looking for an excuse not to write -- this one's for you. Go, look!

Adaptation News: No Prose Purists Allowed!

Will Dwayne "The Rock" Johnson be donning the black and gold tights required to play Captain Marvel's arch nemesis, Black Adam? Um...maybe.


Sometimes the best way to introduce a link is to just quote the linked-to article's title: J.J. Abrams Finishes Reading Dark Tower, Decides Not To Adapt It. Ouch.


Jerry "Mick Jagger's ex-wife" Hall is set to star in a BBC adaptation of Martin Amis' 1984 novel, Money. As the last time anyone anywhere gave a damn about Ms. Hall was sometime in the mid-eighties, this sounds like the perfect fit.


I know one movie I won't be watching! Winona Ryder and Barry Pepper will star in the Hallmark Hall of Fame movie When Love Is Not Enough: The Lois Wilson Story. The ten-tissue telepic is based on the 12-step book by William Borchert.


Stephenie Meyer will appear on Oprah this Friday to talk millionaire to millionaire about the upcoming New Moon film. For uncomfortable kicks, will someone in the audience please ask O why she never chose a Twilight book for her Book Club?


A bankruptcy judge has ruled that Warren Beatty's suit against the Tribune Co. can go forward. Beatty is suing the bankrupt corporation over the TV and movie rights to Dick Tracy, while the Tribune Co. probably just wants to stop Beatty from making any more sh*tty Dick Tracy films.

Go, Look: 60 Ways to Read Watchmen

The Trouble With Comics has compiled a super-long, super-smart list of sixty distinct thematic, artistic, historical, and humorous angles with which to approach Alan Moore and Dave Gibbons' classic comic book mini-series. (Via: CBR)
Go, look!

An Indie Bookseller's Job Is...

... akin to those folks working at Plimoth Plantation. We're a living, breathing memorial to the "good ol' days," only instead of period pilgrim clothes, we dress in coffee-stained cardigans.


...the three Rs: Restaurant recommendations, restroom attendant, and real life MapQuest to the nearest Borders.


...to write down recommendations so that 'customers' can purchase your store's staff picks elsewhere.


...to act as the Wile E. Coyote to the online shopper's Roadrunner. Chase, chase, chase. Fail, fail, fail.


...the first line of defense against poorly put together print-on-demand books.


...to fake smiles, interest, and aesthetic approval.



...list making, link blogging, Twittering trivia.



...sorta depressing when you really stop and think about it.

Book News, In Brief

The Guardian UK imitates the impotent ire of indie British booksellers, b*tches about How Waterstone's Killed Bookselling.


Holy crap. Bookstore employees have rights? And they stand up for them? Publicly? And in the press? Wait, why wasn't I told about this?


Mr. Rogers was an inspiration to countless puppet-loving, trolley obsessed, postman-fetishizing kids. So why the hell are they defaming his memory with this stomach-churning statue?


Admission time: Do you want to know the reason I started dedicating Tuesday's posts to writing links and Thursday's to adaptation news? So I could break up the days between Sarah Palin posts. That said, it's been almost 24 hours. Here's the "leaked" details of Palin's "roguish book tour."


Crain reports that Amazon flew out "a dozen of New York's top literary agents" last week. The point of this powwow? To reassure the agents that Amazon CEO Jeff Bezos is "not trying to destroy publishing as we know it." Check your favorite agents' Twitter feeds to see if they were part of this whorish pilgrimage.

Parental Advisory: Kids Lit Links

YourTango.com offers an easy out to easily embarrassed parents: Use Kid Lit to Teach Your Kids About Sex. (Via.)


The Telegraph UK proclaims 'Comic books are good for children's learning!' (But then, they spell 'color' with a U, so what do they know?)


My favorite new time-killer of a blog? Curious Pages, a self-described hub of "recommended inappropriate books for kids."


A former vicar turned bestselling children’s author has accused the Church of England of being “largely irrelevant” and a “spiritual arm of New Labour.” (But then, he spells 'labor' with a U, so what does he know?)

Quick Question

If we had a drag queen dress up as Sarah Palin for a reading and 'signing,' would you attend? And more importantly, would you buy a book?

Tuesday's Tips for Flailing Writers

Rewriting the rewritten for the umpteenth time? Kidlit.com wonders, How Much Revision is Necessary?


Don't worry, R. Crumb -- jerking off to your own work isn't one of Fuel for Your Writing's 8 Nasty Writing Habits You Should Quit.


While some lucky sonsofb*tches were having sex with their teachers, you and I were picking up the 7 Bad Writing Habits You Learned in School.


Hope for the dying and decrepit: Writers Digest's Publish Your First Book After 50. (I mean, you're still gonna die, but at least you'll die published.)


You're a name on the internet and a celebrity in the blogosphere. Chris Anderson tells you how to turn that exposure into book sales.

3 Choice Tweets

@McMer314: Amused that the health care bill is about as long as Harry Potter 5. Except that people actually read HP5. http://bit.ly/JQqWG


@vromans: Linda Bukowski said that Charles cried at the end of Star Wars. "It was something about Chewbacca."



@theBDR: I was going to take my daughter to the public library today, but, you know, socialism...


(Oh, and by the by, we're on Twitter, too.)

The Cover Art of Superstar Graphic Designer Rodrigo Corral

The name Rodrigo Corral may not fire off any synapses in your brain, but a quick look at some of his cover art will surely set your sense memory atwitter. Dude not only did the cover art compiled below, he's also responsible for the covers to James Frey's infamous A Million Little Pieces and Junot Diaz' Pulitzer Prize-winning The Brief Wondrous Life of Oscar Wao. To see more of Corral's book covers, as well as some of his magazine work, click here. For a 5 question interview with Corral, click here.
















Snuff by Chuck Palahniuk
Bush on the Couch: Inside the Mind of the President by Justin A. Frank
















Him Her Him Again The End of Him by Patricia Marx
How to Think Like a Great Graphic Designer by Debbie Millman
















Rant by Chuck Palahniuk
Here's How I See It, Here's How It Is by Heather Henson

Book News, In Brief

Glenn Beck: Cry-baby, paranoid conspiracy theorist...and thriller fic's #1 sales booster?


Find out if the rumors about Robin are true. Queersupe has compiled an A-Z list of gay comic book characters.


Do it for Johnny! Er...make that, "Do it for money!" Outsiders author S.E. Hinton plans to cash-in with a li'l comics work.


Sarah Palin's book tour kicked off Nov. 1, and she's purposefully avoiding cities with predominantly Democratic voters and early civil rights adopters. For a detailed itinerary, click here.


Single mom? Check. Nearly broke? You betcha. Novel rejected by multiple publishers before a surprise bidding war resulted in a million dollar book deal? Is there any other way? Well, that settles it. Rebecca James is officially this month's 'Next J.K. Rowling.'